African Parenting 101🤕

“It was an awesome movie” Ejiro said as he held my hands. Ok, Ejiro is well a very good friend that just might be a prospective boyfriend material but wooh trust me story for another day. We were just coming back from the cinemas… we finished our exams the day before and decided to just goan relax uno. Amaka was supposed to go with us but trust madam to always Sly at the last minute 🙄

“Yh it was did you see the way that guy kicked the… ” I started but was interrupted by my annoying ringtone. It was my mum. Mum? Why was she calling me? Like we had talked three times today. “Hello MA, Good evening ” I picked the phone and said into the receiver. “Good evening dear, how are you? …where are you” she asked “I’m fine MA, I am on my way to my hostel” I answered “What? By this time? ” “mum, I went to see a movie with a friend please the road is crowded call me back in like 10-30 minutes” “You must be silly” she said and cut the call.

The first thing I did was to check the time… It was after 8 please what is late in after 8 egbami is it because they rhyme. “Is there a problem? ” Ejiro asked “No, not… ” I attempted to answer but before I could my phone rang this time it was my dad “Ngozi where did you say you are?” he did not even wait for greeting. “on my way back to my hostel ” I replied. “where did to go?” “To the movies ” “with a guy or a lady” “a guy ” ***mistake number 1*** “Ngozi ehhh so you have started going out with guys in the night?, first thing tomorrow morning I must see you home. Shebi you have finished exam… Silly girl you think I send you to school to waste away… ” he continued and continued till he was satisfied and cut the call.

I was so pained and my mood was spoilt. My parents were always exaggerating things. I just went to see a movie with a friend that’s all. Irony of life. When I was being a slut they never caught me ooo now that I’m a born again they are now exaggerating up and down. I went over to my sister’s hostel when I got to school to tell her about it and it turned out to be that they already called her and their anger had root. They found messages from Hassel on my former phone which my mom is now using. “But I told you to delete them all before giving Mom” I yelled at my sister “ehn i deleted the very bad ones and left the cute ones incase I needed them” she looked at her feet. ***mistake number 2 – trusting my naive sister.

I did not need a prophet to tell me I was dead but as I went home, I wondered why our parents overreacted and even asked friends and the answer I was getting was “that’s how African parents are” the question is why? Why are they not approachable? Why won’t they make it easy for us to confide in them? Why is it so hard? Sometimes their reactions to things are funny but sometimes too they are actually costly. If my mum was approachable and easy to talk to, she would have known about Hassel and she would have helped me out. But no it is a taboo to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend or even talk to them about it. The very thing they are trying to prevent, happens before their own eyes all the time and they are always the last to know. Maybe that’s how they know how to love but can this generation like try to break the jinx…this whole “Africa Parents Mentality” and just bond with our children, trust them, make out time for them, not controlling their every move up till occupation but give allowances for them to make their own mistakes so they can learn. We laugh about it all the time but sometimes it’s actually costly and those tales we don’t hear.

I arrived home early. Got shouted at, accused of a lot of stuffs even stuffs i did not have guts to do as a bad girl. I was grounded and my phone was seized even my friends were not allowed to see me. Especially Amaka. But a letter got to me through my sister from Amaka and in it was written “Ngozi, I have cancer”.

… And by his Grace we have completed the three posts as promised. God bless you for reading… God bless you and bless you… Please let me know what you think. Till next Friday, I remain Proudmgbeke that loves vanilla ice-cream 🖤

#africanparents